i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize