She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
