Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Please don't give away my fajitas
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