After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
