I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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