You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize