I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize