And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize