Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
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I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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