I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
that's an acceptable place to lick
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
