so explain again why im purple
no
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
