i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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