what day is it and did you see me today?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
