u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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