The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
