I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
