i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
