No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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