Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
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at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
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He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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