I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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