My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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