Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
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And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
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did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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