dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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