It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
