He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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