i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
