I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
