I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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