so that wasnt chicken after all
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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