So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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