.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
