you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
