fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize