She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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