is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
false alarm. still invincible.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize