i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
