are you still at the devil's house?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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