32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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