just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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