I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
