wanna go halves on a baby?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize