I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
God, you're like boner-b-gone
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
