I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I am naked and annoyed.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
