Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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