Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
