You just made me feel so damn special
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
