does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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