okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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