okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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