whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
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