Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
